My siblings and I being silly around 16 years ago…
Those of you who have been faithful readers of Tough Cookie Mommy for years know that I am very candid about my life including my interpersonal relationships. After all, how could I expect you to be authentic with me if I cannot be authentic with you? Within these relationships in my life, the one with my siblings has often been a loving albeit tumultuous one.
As I’m getting older, I am noticing that my inner circle is getting smaller and smaller. Hopefully this has less to do with the fact that I’m driving people away and more to do with the fact that I have begun to prioritize the important people in my life. I think it is a sign of maturity when one starts to realize that, with regards to family and friendships, quality is a lot more important than quantity.
Within my inner circle, my brother and sister play a big part in completing our “Circle of Trust” as my husband so eloquently refers to it. I am the oldest of three siblings and I sorely want to reconnect with my brother and sister and to capture some of the closeness that we had as kids. Back when life was seemingly less complicated, we had each other and that was enough. I think that this should always be enough and that it should be our sibling mantra, so to speak.
My little brother and I. There was never a dull moment growing up.
As I was perusing other blog posts today and reading some articles online, I came across a wonderful article that discussed how maintaining good relationships with your siblings is a very important ingredient to any person’s personal happiness. One particular point stuck out to me which basically stated that the reasons why siblings need each other is because they have seen each other at their worst and will still be there for each other despite that. That is a powerful statement which defines the nature of the sibling relationship, in my humble opinion.
So the next time you argue with your brother or sister for whatever minute reason siblings sometimes argue, think about what your life would be like if your sibling was not in it. Yes, I realize that it is a sad and sobering thought but, we need to be snapped back to reality and be made to realize that maintaining any good familial relationship is not always easy and can sometimes bring out the worst in us. In any case, chances are that your sibling will always have your back, even if you are mad at each other at that moment and only turning your own backs to each other…
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I am an only child but I am hoping that my children will be close when they grow up. Right now they are still in the stage where they get on each other’s nerves.
Great article. I am one of 3 sisters and we have had our differences in the past. I wish we were a little closer as well, but sometimes it is tough to mend those broken bridges. I just keep trying to reach out and one day hopefully it will be different. I am trying to drive the idea to be good to your siblings to my own children.
Love it – I definitely miss my sister and envy those who still have siblings! Have a happy weekend!
I lost one of my brothers in ’08. It’s hard when the rest of the family lives out of state but we make a point to try to see each other once a year and Skype when we can. I think it’s important for our children to connect with their cousins.
I’ve gotten closer with my siblings as I’ve gotten older. I know what you mean about your circle getting smaller; there’s only so much time in the day!
I think sometimes we get so wrapped up in the day to day hustle and bustle of life that we forget to take the time to connect with our siblings. We don’t put in as much effort to maintain a relationship with them as we do with other people. I think part of it is that we just always know they will be there. Great post!
I’ve always felt like an only child because my siblings are/were 12 and 11 years older than me. It was rough to connect. My late brother, who was the oldest had a really gruff personality. Because of that we never really connected. It’s so sad to me. After we got married and he had his kids he was a bit better. But the distance doesn’t help us. My other brother has been in DR since I was 16 so he’s never met my husband or kids. I haven’t seen him since I was 16! i definitely wish we were closer.
As a child I never spoke to my half siblings I always knew they was there but didn’t see the need to add to my family at that point in time… years down the line my circle of trust people has come to very little! In early 2016 I reached out to my half siblings and now they have kids, one of them are married and they are settled down they seem less interested in wanting to get to know me like I did them. I mean i see my sister 1-2 times a month but i wish we was closer i wish we could build bridges but they burned long time ago and no sign of rebuild. I just wish they was there to speak too but there not. I only get too see 2 of my nieces and it’s great they are growing up so fast and I wish them the happiest of futures and hope they know that their aunt will always be there. I love all of them and I will be waiting if they ever want to connect