How Do I Love Thee?


    Today I came to the realization that I definitely need to make time to spend some quality time with my husband.  Many of you might think that it is funny that I would just suddenly come to that conclusion randomly on a Tuesday evening.  However, I’m sure those of you who are married with children know and understand exactly where I am coming from.  Somehow, we get so wrapped up in working, raising children, paying bills, maintaining a home, and all of the good stuff that comes with adulthood that we forget to slow down.

    Now, don’t get me wrong, this is NOT one of those “oh my goodness, my marriage is in trouble so let me blog about how I am going to hold on to my man!”  Quite the contrary, I’m very lucky to have a great husband and a great marriage.  That doesn’t mean that I can’t take a moment to think about the fact that I haven’t had a lot of time to spend quality couple time with my main squeeze.  We are very much in love so it stands to reason that we would miss each other when we get consumed with burning the candles at both ends.

    When I say “burning the candle at both ends” I mean it literally.  He works nights and I work days so we are like two ships passing in the night during weekdays.  Luckily, we both have weekends off so we are able to devote all of that time to our family and our boys.  What we haven’t done in awhile is go on a date.  Yes, a date.  Don’t shake your head because you think that married couples don’t have any right to call their romantic encounters a “date.”  We absolutely love, and should love, going on dates and keeping the fire lit, so to speak.

    Having children is the most rewarding experience in a person’s life, in my opinion.  Unfortunately, those little bundles of joy have a way of sucking the quality couple time from their parents.  It is really important that mothers and fathers still make time to romance each other even though they happen to be somebody’s parents.  If anything, it just makes this time more treasured by both people and really reaffirms the love that bore the fruits that created their family.

    So, here is what I am going to do…I am going to grab my husband this weekend, tell him how much I love him, send the kiddies to Grandma and Grandpa Land, and spend some lovey dovey, couple time together.  Those of you following my blog, who have small children or children of any age, know what I am talking about.  As important as it is for us to immerse ourselves in being parents, it is equally important to make special time for the men and women we love, regularly.  It was just you and that special person before the kids came and it will be you and that special person after the kids leave.  Think about that…

© 2010, Tough Cookie Mommy. All rights reserved.


  1. You are so right! Romance and time together as a couple is key.
    We are also burning the candle at both ends too. But I? Tend to blame it on Twitter (for me) and my husband's new laptop… Ggrr!

    Great post 🙂

  2. Thanks, Maryline. There are so many things that get in the way of spending romantic time with your partner when you are taking care of a family together. I can understand the Twitter thing because I am recently getting really good at it and actually enjoying it. My husband does not care for the computer too much but he is a sports addict. Double grrr! Come back anytime!

  3. I wish you and your husband a fantastic date! Good on you girl! Just because you're married, doesn't mean romance has to stop. Romance should always be in the air, even if you don't see each other, like make little love notes, give him a sexy look in the eye when kids aren´t watching, etc.

    Wish you loads of fun! 🙂

  4. Hear, hear!! I second (or third) these sentiments. I often hear this kind of reminder, but I don't heed it as much as I would like; Thanks for the much needed nudge to take time off from gazing at my computer screen and instead gaze into my hubby's wonderful green eyes tonight!

  5. Thank you so much, Funkkeejooce, I will definitely try to have a fantastic date! Before I got married, my Aunt gave me this very same advice that you have. She told me to always keep my marriage spicy and interesting. I didn't understand the importance of what she said then but I certainly do now.

  6. Tisha, I don't heed it as much as I would like to either. This is especially true when I'm super busy with work, the kids, and all the other stuff that comes flying at us every single day. Enjoy the quality time with hubby tonight!

  7. I know exactly what you mean and it's so great that you listen to your own intuition about what needs to happen. Sounds like a great plan!

  8. Couple time… hmmm… heard of it! Not sure what it is though! LOL! With 4 kids (14, 10, 8, 8m), my full time job, him owning his own business we have our hands full!
    I do wish that we had more time to do stuff together! It just seems that it never happens.

  9. Charlene, believe it or not, my intuition has been gnawing at me all week. Watching him leave for work and missing him dearly after he left was all the motivation that I needed.

  10. Jackie, you certainly have a heaping plate chock full of busy, busy, busy! I completely understand that all of those responsibilities make it really tricky to schedule in that much needed quality time together. It sounds like you need to have a "date" too. Start clearing the calendar and go for it!


  1. Maria says:

    RT @toughcookiemom Tough Cookie Mommy: How Do I Love Thee?

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